Posted in eating / losing weight, original

Enough

How thin is thin?

When will it be enough?

Count the carbs

Count the calories

Count the pounds and the kilograms

Count the tears

Count the frustrations

Count the failures and the success

But when will it all end?

How thin is thin?

When will I be enough?

©Maria Michaela

Posted in favorites, self / self esteem

Scales

I stepped on the weighting scale and I looked up

Afraid of what I’ll see when I look down as the weight may not have dropped.

I crossed my fingers and even my toes

Hoping to end a bit of my woes.

Slowly I looked down, praying the scale would be good to me

And then!

©Maria Michaela

Posted in original, self / self esteem

Starve

If I starve myself will you be kinder?

If I starve myself will you be nicer?

Will you treat me better?

Will you be just a little sweeter?

If I starve myself to meet your standards,

Will you accept me with arms wide open afterwards?

So I starve myself and I begin to deteriorate

My starvation, it accelerates

I drown and become lost

I only paid for my life, it’s not much of a cost.

Posted in original, self / self esteem

Curves

To be fat is to be shameful

To be fat means to feel awful

This is what I learned as a child.

.

My family loved me, and I know they tried

Tried to protect me, but they do not know how much I cried

Because whenever I have an ounce of confidence

Society retaliates with a pound of uncertainty.

.

My curves became my curse and I hated myself

I felt like an unwanted book tucked away on the shelf

I hated my curves.

.

There are nights I’d pick myself up

Saying that I am enough and I am loved

But most nights…..most nights are awful

.

I lie to myself sometimes

That if I love my curves enough

Society will accept them and I will no longer need to hide

Posted in original, self / self esteem

I Will Lose

Shed those extra weight 

Remove all self hate

Driving oneself to the distance

It takes a lot of hard work, give yourself a chance

Don’t give up now, you’ve come a long way

Show them what you’re made of now insead of waiting for someday

Sweat it out and enjoy yourself

I go on and tell this to myself

No one will do it for me

And so I go at it, in the end we shall see

Posted in eating / losing weight, original, self / self esteem

He Said I Was Beautiful

He told me I was beautiful and I believed him.
He said I’d be gorgeous if I were a bit more slim.
I took his words and did my best,
To try and make jealous of the rest.
I hardly ate, exercised a lot but even then,
He had eyes for others so that was when,
I decided to give him up.
I realized my happiness would not stop
If I let him go.

He said I was beautiful and I took the compliment,
But never will I ever let his words be my supplement
To my happiness