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Be Glad Your Nose Is In Your Face

Be glad your nose is on your face,
not pasted on some other place,
for if it were where it is not,
you might dislike your nose a lot.

Imagine if your precious nose
were sandwiched in between your toes,
that clearly would not be a treat,
for you’d be forced to smell your feet.

Your nose would be a source of dread
were it attached atop your head,
it soon would drive you to despair,
forever tickled by your hair.

Within your ear, your nose would be
an absolute catastrophe,
for when you were obliged to sneeze,
your brain would rattle from the breeze.

Your nose, instead, through thick and thin,
remains between your eyes and chin,
not pasted on some other place–
be glad your nose is on your face!

-Jack Prelutsky

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As Soon As Fred Gets Out of Bed

As soon as Fred gets out of bed,
his underwear goes on his head.
His mother laughs, “Don’t put it there,
a head’s no place for underwear!”
But near his ears, above his brains,
is where Fred’s underwear remains.

At night when Fred goes back to bed,
he deftly plucks it off his head.
His mother switches off the light
and softly croons, “Good night! Good night!”
And then, for reasons no one knows,
Fred’s underwear goes on his toes.

– Jack Prelutsky

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When A Silly Bird Came

a very silly bird came to me one day

and asked me when was the last time I prayed?

it caught me off guard for it had been a while

I did not know what to reply

I felt ashamed and forced a smile

but the silly bird chirped and asked again

I paused and tried to bargain

but he just went on and asked,

“When was the last time you prayed?”

I didn’t know what to say, Oh! I felt ashamed

because I haven’t prayed for long time

it’s awful! in itself such a crime!

 

the silly bird looked at me and sighed

it looked like he was about to cry,

so I said I prayed yesterday, but he knew I lied

he sat on my windowsill and patted my hand

apparently he wanted me to sit, not stand

 

he then told me this,

“Each day the Lord greets you with a kiss

he sends this through the breeze

He knows everything you do and have done,

including when you sneeze.

He listens to your ranting, ever so patient

He’s with you always and never absent.

He sends the sun to light up your day

all he asks in return is that you pray.

He knows you are tired

He knows when you’re sick

He knows when you tell the truth

and when you’re just rubbing cheek.

He hears your cry and rejoices with your laughter

He wants you to live with him,

happy ever after.

All he asks in return is you pray

and promise to never go astray.”

 

And with that, the silly bird flew out of my window

to the windowsill, I placed my elbow

I closed my eyes and clasped my hands

time to get out of this wasteland

I prayed that day like I never did before

I promised, to no longer ignore

I thanked God for sending the silly bird

and know that my prayers are heard