A smile so natural, you don’t know what it does to me.
Hoping someday you’ll see
That you and I could become “we”
That would be a plus!
There’s nothing else to discuss.
I hope to me, you’d be interested
Because with myself, I am infuriated
As I can’t keep straight the things I’ve stated
I am much too infatuated
How difficult it must be to love me
How hard it must be not to be noticed
To be put aside
Like I’ve done to so many
And yet, I do not feel the loneliness
Either I am numb or just happy to be without anyone
Like the beauty of the darkness that is often left unnoticed
These feelings I feel for you are like so
In the background,
Because no matter how much I’d like to tell you
I know better
I should and must keep my mouth shut
I shouldn’t think about it
But the more I do,
The clearer it is
That most often we do not see
What is in front of us
But yes, I admit
That you do have potential
To be loved?
To be wanted?
Am I too ugly….
To be taken seriously?
To be longed?
To be sought?
Am I too ugly….
To be noticed?
i can’t blame you if you don’t feel the same way as i do
can’t blame you even if i really wanted to
you joke around and it’s so easy for you
because the feeling is not as mutual as i’d like to think it so
i’d leap at every opportunity to be with you
yet you easily turn me down
you flirt around a girl you find attractive
can’t do anything about it because you are not mine to own
you ask if i’m okay but that’s not what you should be asking
ask me if i’m jealous,
ask me if i’m hurt
because pretending to be okay is easy
but what i’ve been wanting to do is tell you the truth
all you have to do is ask the question that you didn’t
like the fish in the sea or the leaves on a tree
admire you, are attracted to you
Then I wonder
if somehow you noticed
or are noticing
some signs perhaps?
does it show?
a pretender am I
and a good one at that
I hide reality and wrap myself around
the fake smile
though I long still for some attention
I know deep within
friendship is what you only offer
I still dream and wish that at least this once
at least this time
at least you
would ever take notice of me
In front of you but you do not see
Eyes of brown looking through
Past me and through the wall
Wondering if you really do see
You see only another girl
Another friend and nothing more
Wishing you could feel the way I do
Hints sent and point taken
But still we are here
And nothing more
Am I really just that girl?
The one familiar?
Can’t I ever be anything more
than just the faceless one?
Ignore the scars, the battered face
In darkness I unfold but never to be seen
Unknowing passersby stare straight through
Yet they do not see
And they never will
For I fade into the backdrop and blend unto dilapidated buildings
I am a mere shadow ignored all the time
For I seem unimportant
My movement is silent, unseen and unknown
Like a whisper so silently noisy
A phantom I am, for all not to see
Invisible to the naked eye
I am a shadow
A secret that remains buried
Ignored by the times
And will be forgotten before ever being remembered