Posted in original, self / self esteem

Curves

To be fat is to be shameful

To be fat means to feel awful

This is what I learned as a child.

.

My family loved me, and I know they tried

Tried to protect me, but they do not know how much I cried

Because whenever I have an ounce of confidence

Society retaliates with a pound of uncertainty.

.

My curves became my curse and I hated myself

I felt like an unwanted book tucked away on the shelf

I hated my curves.

.

There are nights I’d pick myself up

Saying that I am enough and I am loved

But most nights…..most nights are awful

.

I lie to myself sometimes

That if I love my curves enough

Society will accept them and I will no longer need to hide

Posted in original, self / self esteem

See Myself Thin

It’s not funny

I’m self conscious…all the time

I look at the mirror

Try to cheer myself up

Gain the confidence

But it gets depleted with each people who look at me funny.

The skinny can easily find clothes that fit

The heavy….well, we often struggle

My self esteem has left years ago

So I curl up on my bed

And hide in my room

Posted in original, self / self esteem

Smaller Frame

And so I came to realize that people with smaller size, smaller frame

Gets the praise, popularity and fame

They always seem to win the game

Of one size fits all.

I never try an outfit where they can see, for fear of being shamed

And perhaps, fear of being maimed

They may not laugh at me but I’ll feel awful just the same

Such an awful feeling.

My confidence, I can never tame

I am just another fat suffering dame

I feel so lame

For wanting to be one of those with smaller frames

Posted in original, self / self esteem

I Will Lose

Shed those extra weight 

Remove all self hate

Driving oneself to the distance

It takes a lot of hard work, give yourself a chance

Don’t give up now, you’ve come a long way

Show them what you’re made of now insead of waiting for someday

Sweat it out and enjoy yourself

I go on and tell this to myself

No one will do it for me

And so I go at it, in the end we shall see