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Strings Of Emotions

She cradled her heart in her hands
Clasped it gently
Waterfalls in her eyes

They do not see the storm inside
The invisible battle

Her thoughts linger
Chaos beneath what most assume is calm
Her emotions are bipolar
Because of one boy

She longs for his love, attention and friendship
But the expanse is vast and immense
They are closely worlds apart

She finds herself at the crossroads once more
Or maybe she never left in the first place

Unworthiness

Unworthy!
Am I unworthy to be something more?
I feel rejected,
Unlovable,
Unacceptable,
Not good enough,

Some say I’m much of a goody two shoes
Too good to be true
Funny and one of the guys
It’s a compliment, I know
But that’s all I’ll ever be
Maybe that’s all I am

Bow down to my unworthiness!

Take me back down memory lane
But I don’t want to stay there
I’ve been stuck there for too long
Time to get up and move along

Yet nothing pleases me more than to see you happy
Are you happy now?
Because I pray that you are

My heart!
Yes, my heart is still breaking
But I’m trying to heal
And I know I can only completely do so with you around

See, although our friendship hasn’t been that long
I feel like we’re two old souls
Who have been together for a lifetime
Lost at sea
And found each other again

I pray the awkwardness will soon end
Because I really miss the chats we used to have

Simply Stop

I’m going to stop trying

I’m going to stop caring

I will stop thinking

And trying to put meaning to everything

I will let things happen as they are

And will not mind

 

I am torturing myself

Making a fool of myself

Making it sad and difficult

I will do the best I can

To block this silliness

I want to be numb

And maybe

I can finally move on

I know I said I’m over

I know I said I’m done

It’s kind of complicated

But there’s a little bit of fun

 

I’m feeling kind of stupid

Feeling kind of dumb

I already know the answer

I’m being such a bum

 

Keep the friendship, let go of the feelings

Easier said than done

Most would have run for the hills

Most would have been lost and gone

 

I can over come this

I just have to be strong

I know it will never be easy

I just have to remember where I belong

Emotions Dance

A ballet, a free dance of expression

He moves and so do I

We both don’t say much

But our actions say a whole lot

 

I say my sorry

And he says it’s fine

But still I can’t hold my stare

He seems to be reading me

And I feel naked

And ashamed for what I have done

 

We’ll continue with this dance

Until the dizziness subsides

Little Part

I’m a mess

I am unpredictable

I can be indecisive

Yet when I come up with a decision

I am stubborn

 

I breathe fresh flowers in the mornings

Be optimistic

But weak at heart

I am changeable yet unchanged

This is me

A little part of me

 

Hugs

Hugs for the lonely

Hugs for those who are happy

Hugs for the brave

And those who dared

Hugs for those who crave

And those who are scared

 

Hugs are for everyone

And everyone deserves a hug

Clearly Ambiguous

He slips his fingers between mine

Oh! They feel unfamiliarly familiar

He is not mine, though inside I can only wish he was

But we belong together

 

Together but not to each other

No questions asked

Ambiguity as it is

I breathed in deeply as our bodies become closer

Interlocked in a real hug

I’m engulfed with his perfume

As we bid adieu for the moment

Inexperienced Heart

I gave it all and so I died

Oh to break to a thousand pieces!

 

Yet before the fall

I climbed mountains and leapt buildings

I caught stars and was invincible

I thought I could do it all

And I did…

For a time…

 

A hole grew, it’s still there

Yet I learned to become whole

 

I craved his attention

Not as much now

Though I still wonder if he is or has given me

 

I died  and

now I am slowly about to be free to soar

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